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8 year oldI’m not talking about the people on it or my news feed, I mean actual Facebook. Well … the advertising. Those ads on the right-hand side of the page or those integrated into your feeds. The recommended, sponsored and suggested pages are what I’m talking about.
To be honest, I feel like they are trying to tell me something, and what they are trying to tell me isn’t great.
To my knowledge, they are targeted. Meaning, they are matched with you individually depending on what you google, your age, your pics and your status. So they know what you like and can get click-throughs based on your life online.
But sometimes they are confronting, and can remind you of how sad your life is.
Here are some of the ads f-rom the last week in my feed:
“Stylists in your area now”
“Cover those greys. Instantly cover your regrowth. Bye Bye grey”
“Feeling old? Considered Botox?”
“Over 30 and not married? Ways to get him to pop the question”
“Oreo Cadbury chocolate now available in a Coles near you”
“24 hour Maccas breakfast in your area”
Seriously. Facebook ads are suggesting that I make poor fashion choices, I am going grey, I’m in need of Botox, I am desperate to be married, I enjoy the combination of Oreo and chocolate (what human doesn’t?) and I love McDonalds.
I mean, all are true. And yes I clicked on all of them ... But man, it hurts. It’s like my sad life is being reflected back to me.
But this isn’t the first time Facebook has come at me with its passive aggressive life suggestions. When I first broke up with boyfriend seven years ago the advertisements were at first:
“Feeling Flirty”
“Find singles in your area. Gorgeous guys want to meet YOU!”
“Plenty of Fish in the Sea”
Fine. But a year later, Facebook just gave up on me and the ads changed:
“Buy Dine for your feline”
“Get into the gym and lose a dress size”
“Speed dating, get back on the horse”
Then after a three years, Facebook (the cheeky beast), thought any boyfriend was better than none. And this ad appeared on my feed:
“Ways to Get Your Ex Back”
“Facts about freezing your eggs”
And just before I met my current boyfriend it was, (and I’m 100% serious):
“Find your Lesbian Match at eHarmony.com”
I guess it’s not all bad. I did meet a lovely lady called Melissa.
Don’t even get me started on Facebook memories.
Tanya Hennessy is the host of Hit 104.7 Breakfast in Canberra. Follow her onFacebook.
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