Tanya Hennessy: I can’t sleep with my boyfriend

We have tried for months but it’s just not happening.

We just can’t sleep in the same bed.

If we sleep next to each other, in the same bed, we don’t sleep. Period. We are at the point where we get excited if the other is home late or staying at a friend’s house, because it means we might get a few hours in.

We have been together 18 months and have slept in the same bed consistently for 3 months. As of right now we are both getting only 2-3 hours a night. We toss and turn and sleep in 30 minute intervals.

As a result, were both so grouchy, moody and have really short fuses with each other (and everyone to be honest). Both of us dread going to bed, what a weird reality to find yourself in.

It’s annoying to be honest. I work in breakfast radio which requires me to be up at 4am every day. Sleep is essential — as I get very little at the best of time. Also, sleep is AMAZING.

I should point out we only just moved in together and it’s great. He is great, and we’re annoyingly in love. But, for the love of God … I cannot get a wink of sleep when I’m in a bed with him.

So, would it be totally abnormal for me to sleep in a separate bed to my boyfriend?

According to a 2015 survey by the National Sleep Foundation, nearly one in five couples sleep in separate bedrooms or beds, leading me to think it’s not as strange as I first thought.

I just assumed all couples slept in the same bed. When I saw that study I was shocked.

But I keep asking myself these questions on repeat:

What does it mean? Is there something wrong with our relationship? Is there something wrong with me? Do we not love each other enough? Am I being ridiculous even contemplating this? Will people talk and judge us as a failed couple? Can we separate on weekdays and sleep in the same room on weekends? I don’t personally know any other couple that does this because it’s not that openly spoke about, why is that?

I will give it another month. If we can’t sleep together in the one bed after that, we are just going to have accept the fact that we need sleep and we need another bed.

Tanya Hennessy is the host of Hit 104.7 Breakfast in Canberra. Follow her onFacebook.