The problem with flaunting your relationship on Facebook

The modern day equivalent of this is spruiking it on social media.

Many of us have friends who post countless pics of a candlelit date night, or a dinner that “hubby” has lovingly made, often accompanied by the hashtag “blessed”.

Sure — being grateful for what you have is healthy. But often it feels as if these posts come from more of a smug place (or alternatively couples that post too much could be trying to overcompensate for their unhappiness and make it appear otherwise).

It’s a scientific fact that these people are generally perceived as pretty painful. As psychologist Gwendolyn Seidman politely puts it “posting overly personal information about one’s relationship can make a bad impression on others”.

“Studies have shown that people who post highly disclosing statuses about their relationships are liked less by others”.

Someone who loves to document his relationship online is property developer and former Auburn City Council mayor Salim Mehajer.

Last year he married Aysha Learmonth in a wedding that almost made Kim and Kanye’s nuptials look a little low budget.
There were controversial helicopters. Streets were closed down. Pretty sure a seaplane was also involved somehow. There’s a wedding video at the top of this post if you want to feast your eyes.

Since then Salim has posted numerous declarations of love for his wife on his public Facebook page.
He gives Shakespeare a run for his money with the line “may God protect your doll face”:

Here, they don’t regret getting into a hammock.

This is a favourite. He seems to think he and his wife are amphibians.

But the Salim/Aysha love affair seems to have turned sour, with news that police have Aysha has applied for an apprehended violence order on Aysha’s behalf, on the eve of their one-year anniversary.

Here we encounter the first issue with being so vocal about your relationship and oversharing online. When things go pear-shaped, there’s the equivalent of a digital corpse there for people to pick over.

Right now, media and random Salim-watchers are doing just that — trying to join the dots using Facebook posts in the lead-up to the AVO (note that Aysha’s silence in recent times hasn’t gone unnoticed).

Salim posted this profound statement on Facebook last Thursday at 4am (a time when all the best, most coherent thoughts tend to happen):

Following that head-scratcher he pulled his Facebook page down. But then it was up again! And then on Saturday he posted this picture asking people to comment on his wife’s new hair colour.

Some people are saying these are older pictures that Salim is posting from happier times, in an attempt to give the impression that it’s all business as usual when it comes to their marriage (though he denies these claims).

It’s all turning into a bit of a soap opera that is being played out on his Facebook page.

Ultimately, this is the problem with saying “look at me, look at me”. Because when the chips are down and you want privacy, everyone will be doing exactly as you asked.