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Man avoids sex with wife over her body insecurities after giving birth

the argument really kicked off
Turning 50 does not mean the end of sex. Source: iStock

Turning 50 does not mean the end of sex. Source: iStock

It’s been four months since the unnamed man's wife gave birth to their beautiful twin daughters.

As expected, adjusting to life with two demanding babies after an extremely complicated pregnancy hasn’t been exactly easy.

But new parenthood has also come with a side effect that he never saw coming - his wife has started covering her upper body during sex.

“The thing is, I don't get turned on when she does this and sex has become another chore,” the distraught dad wrote on Reddit.

“I've told her many times that she's actually the most beautiful person I've ever met and she shouldn't be embarrassed. 

"But she still continues to do that.

“Would I be the a**hole if I decide to stop having sex with her?”
 

The dad took to Reddit to vent his feelings. Source: Reddit
The dad took to Reddit to vent his feelings. Source: Reddit

 

"You should be thanking your lucky stars that she's willing to do it at all"

The post quickly went viral, amassing over 800 comments in a matter of hours.

Many commenters, especially those with kids of their own, were quick to call the dad out for his “selfish” behaviour.

“She’s likely suffering from postpartum depression and she needs support through that, whereas the situation you bring up is, as far as we can tell, just random selfishness,” one mum said.

“What's the turn off about it?” another user asked.

“You're not attracted to her with a shirt on? Or is it the insecurity/you being annoyed that she's not listening to you?”

“You’re an a**hole for being inconsiderate about her body insecurity and for treating sex like it's a privilege for you to withhold from her,” a mum said.

“Only four months in with twins, you should be thanking your lucky stars that she's willing to do it at all.”

"You need to be patient with your wife”

Several mums also jumped in to share their experiences with post-baby sex.

One woman was so embarrassed by her leaking boobs that she took to wearing her bra during sex.

“While I KNOW my husband loves my boobs and doesn't care about leakage, it bothers me, and is painful to have them doing their own thing during sex,” she said.

“If he had a problem with this we wouldn't have any sex because it's hard to get turned on when you're in pain and leaking everywhere

“Your wife JUST had twins, her body is still dealing with hormones,” another mum said.

 “If you stop having sex with her, it will just make her feel MORE insecure.

“Your wants and needs are valid but you need to be patient with your wife.”
 

An accurate representation of this Reddit thread. Source: Pinterest
An accurate representation of this Reddit thread. Source: Pinterest

 

At that, the argument really kicked off

This comment kicked off a heated argument between Reddit users, who couldn’t agree on whose comfort should be prioritised.

“I think he’s an a**hole because he straight up phrased it like "I’m not having sex until you do what I want to turn me on again’,” one woman said.

“That seems totally fair, though,” another user responded.

“He's apparently already been taking one for the team for a while now and doesn't want to have unenjoyable sex anymore. What part of that makes him an asshole?”

“You’re telling him that his wants and needs are second par to hers just because she had babies?” a mum asked.

 “That’s disheartening to hear.”

“He doesn't want to have sex with her because HE IS NOT AROUSED when his wife keeps her clothes on during sex,” another man added.

“You people are f**king gross for suggesting a man must have sex against his wishes.”
 

But some commenters seemed to have all the solutions. Source: Pinterest
But some commenters seemed to have all the solutions. Source: Pinterest

 

“Work together on this, you're partners"

But in amongst the fighting, a few kind angels actually tried to solve the man’s dilemma, coming up with some practical solutions to help improve their sex life.

“I had my third baby one year ago. My stomach definitely looks differently than it did before I had any children (let alone three!),” one woman said.

“My husband loves my body, but I still have the occasional moments of self-consciousness. When I'm feeling insecure, I like to wear lingerie or a cute nightie.

“My husband likes it, I like it, and it hides any area I might not be keen on showing at the time.

“If you think this might help, suggest it to your wife. You could even pick the item(s) out together!”

“Can you support her during this difficult and transitional time by being enthusiastic in bed?” another mum suggested.

“Work together on this, you're partners.

“If you want to be happy, neither of you can afford to stagnate and take a stand on this.”

Source: News Corp Australia Network:

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