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You Don't Want to Be At Coachella Right Now, Anyway

So just watch this livestream.

 

Let's be real. This weekend it's supposed to hit the mid-90s in the Coachella Valley by day and d-rop to the low 60s at night. That's a 30 degree temperature swing that you'll have to deal with if you're attending Coachella Music Festival. How do you dress for that? You don't want to carry around a jacket all day in 90 degree weather.

You don't want to freeze your ass of at night. And the weather, that's just one annoying thing you'll have to deal with if you go to the festival this weekend. You'll be surrounded by all those horrible people wearing H&M's Coachella line. Almost no one will actually be listening to the music. Imagine how many times you'll be shoved aside by a group of friends pushing through the crowd all holding hands. Or how often you'll get socked in the side of the head by a misplaced fist pump.

You'll end up standing directly behind someone with those annoying-as-hell signs the whole damn time. You'll blow every last cent you own on insultingly expensive booze and shitty food. You'll have to camp or make the miserable journey back to town for your hotel. You'll probably leave some drugs in your jean short pockets and get arrested at security on your way home.

 

Just enjoy the festival f-rom this live stream. You're not missing anything. Anything. Buy a six pack. A bottle of wine. Spend the night on your couch. Turn off your phone. The Coachella livestream kicks off at 6 p.m. ET on Friday, and you can be perfectly alone and comfortable while watching LCD Soundsystem return, and Axl Rose melt down, and whatever it is Calvin Harris does.
 

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Author: Esquire

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